Respecting you're elders is important, but not at the price it is costing this nation.
A saying says: do in Africa as Africans do, do in China as Chinese do.
We are "not" in China, even though most of the elders here have Chinese origins. You are "not" Chinese anymore, so stop being Chinese and start being Singaporean.
As I was told, Singapore is the melting of cultures, Malay, Chinese, Indian and a lot of other Asian origins live here. But there are also European, English, American, Australian, New-Zealand and some more ...
The thing is, you are all caught up so much in the respect to elderly thing, that u force the Chinese culture down the throat of everyone!!!
It is in small and big things, like not eating in the room if it is too hot in the kitchen, not being allowed to choose what kind of school you go to because they drew out you're path for you, not allowing you to make any choices when u are young to a lot more complex social interactions i know u all are aware off.
The people that ran away from China to start all over, away from that Chinese dictatorial culture, they knew how to do it. They did break lose, but somehow the following generation did not get the message right, and fell right back into the Chinese culture trap that dictates you're lives away from freedom.
Maybe before looking into the political culture trap you are in right now, you need to get out of this mindset that keeps u all prisonners.
I heard a lot of people say to me that in Europe we do not take care enough of our elders, do you know why exaclty?
Our elders actually take care of us, make sure the next generation gets a chance. They give us the opportunities we need instead of taking them away from us like the Chinese culture does.
My parents are going to help my husband and me to buy an apartment, while my husband's Chinese parents won't help us at all, only his mother who is a bit more free thinking tries to help us a bit even tho she does not have much.
Culture is the first thing to hold everything back. I don't say to disrespect you're elders, i say to educate them into the 21st century.
U cannot as a elderly parent expect you're children to take care of you and their own family. This is not ancient China where people lived in big houses and every family would have their own wing of the house to live in and just meet to dine together before going their own ways in their part of the house again.
Now u are not living in those big houses, you live in prison cell like HDB flats. And just like in prison u suffer preservation stress because u have no privacy, no moments of you're own.
In those olden days the families were huge, it was not just one person taking care of the elderly, it was like 4 brothers and 5 sisters pitching in with their own families handing over food and clothing, not the fortunes one guy or girl needs to lay down in these days to keep the elderly properly comfortable.
Young adults need to be on their own to figure out who they are and who they want to be and not be brainwashed to do as their parents did, just because their parents don't know any better.
It is up to the young generation to show the parents this is the 21st century.
U cannot leave you're parents dumb and ignorant, u cannot let you're parents keep on doing the same mistakes all over day after day.
If u want to shape up a nation it starts with the right education, not only for the children but also for the elderly, because the elderly will influence the children most.
Take the best of all the cultures u have around you, you are a young nation and you have the chance and opportunity to change.
If u are not going to act upon that, this will be New China one day.
A Belgian in Singapore
TRS contributor